Ugly. Not Cute. Horrendous. You Look Fat.

Why are these J Brand CARGOS all the rage right now? What part of ugly does the fashion set and the impressionable consumer not understand?! Personally, my thighs are big enough without a freaking cargo pocket attached to them, but if you’re going for the saddlebag look, then look no further:

Speaking of baffling fashion trends, what about cowboy boots and dresses??* I forgot how much that trend sucks until I read The Neapolitan Mastiff’s arousing (wink, wink) take on it. Check it out on Exchanging Pleasantries.

*I’m not going to be shady about this. I’ll own up: I rocked this look when I was a freshman in college, and I seem to remember thinking I looked good. AAAAGGGGHHH THE REGRET!! At least it was kind of current back then?? And not just an ensemble that thirty-somethings searching for their youth donned on weekends??? I certainly didn’t mean to dress myself like I was asking for it! I’m sorrrrrry Mommmm.

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11 responses to “Ugly. Not Cute. Horrendous. You Look Fat.

  1. Ugh I freaking hate cargo pants. Seriously, what is up with them??? They remind me of guys with sagging pants they got from Zumiez in junior high. The only thing worse than khaki cargos are denim cargos. I just barfed in my mouth a little thinking about it.

    I do have to say that I like the fatigue green color trend. Maybe that’s just because I think I look really good in that color.

    And to make my long comment even longer, I totally WANTED cowboy boots when that whole trend was going down, and thank god I was a broke college student and chose buying beer over those boots.

    That’s all.

  2. i knew this post was coming.

    agree completely. vom.

  3. disagree. sorry. but not really. :)

  4. the whole ‘bring out your inner tomboy’, combat and military fatigues is all the rage…i just wish our hips didnt need to suffer. There are PLENTY of other ways to bring out the utilitarian trend without adding 50 lbs to your body :)

  5. Wink, wink… huh? I thought it was practically literoctica.

    Thanks for the shout out.

  6. Confession: I remember rocking green cargo pants, stack heels & a black corset with tiny red pin-stripes back in ’03 and feeling awesome about it. By the grace of God, at some point in 2005 I transformed those cargos into bermuda shorts that are solely for poolside lounging.

  7. I lol’d at your anecdote. Maybe you can right your fashion wrongs by never allowing little miss Lily to make the same mistakes! ;)

  8. Pingback: I didn’t think it could get any worse… | If I Pooped Gold Bars…

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