Shit is about to get nuptial.

I apologize in advance if Gold Bars turns into a wedding blog, but my sister just got engaged!!! Here’s what happened: He proposed. She said yes. I screamed and jumped around.

Then I asked when we were going dress shopping.

It happened just one week ago, but I’ve already begun taking my Maid of Honor duties very seriously. I researched my responsibilities online (How soon is too soon to start planning the bachelorette party?), I’ve been helping with the initial celebrations (Shall I open another bottle of champagne?), but most importantly, I am imparting upon the bride-to-be my unwavering support and trusted advice:

  • When a callous gawker asks, “How big is the diamond??”, you have multiple response options:
    • As big as your mom is packin.
    • Bigger than the first one he tried to give me!
    • 8 carats*
  • It is vital that someone on your guest list can do The Worm and has a low dignity threshold.

That’s all for now, but I’m sure there will be many more pearls of wisdom to come!

*Adjust this number for you own carat weight, but remember that it must be obviously inflated if you’re going to get your point across.

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2 responses to “Shit is about to get nuptial.

  1. love it sis.

  2. Pingback: Dress Shopping > Venue Shopping « If I Pooped Gold Bars…

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